My 2 Pints
Recently I popped down to Shoreditch/Old Street’s Hoxton area for my 2 pints, and hole myself up in a charming little pub just off the uber-hip Hoxton Sq. You can tell the area’s a trendy one as I previously had no idea where it was.
As soon as we arrived, in less time than it took to peruse the offered bitters (turns out only John Smiths, which to Gazz might as well have been a puddle and small straw), Gazz had commented on how much alike it was to someone’s house. With a tiny two-man bar in a corner previously large enough only for a small TV, and three small tables packed into the opposite side of the room (a Woody Allen’s stone throw away), the place had the feeling of a sitting room all right. A sitting room in a squatter’s house.
As we moved upstairs on the promise of a roof terrace, the first floor involved another room. This time resembling a sitting room more befitting for a Great Aunt, a place that hasn’t entertained anyone under the age of 85 for the last 50 years. Even the dust was coughing into a bloodied handkerchief (one of those old ones with embroidered flowers that no one has anymore). As part of the ambience, this room houses more eclectic furniture than a flea market, none if it actually working properly. They’ve filled the walls with photographs, just to cover the stereotypically 70s, sense-confusing wallpaper you’d only see on a British Soap. The photographs aren’t actually of anything though.
In a common pub, depending on the classiness of the place you might find original art, black & white pictures of the pub or area, art prints, or perhaps family photos… but this has pictures of toilet doors, of the sky, a park. I’m certain they just needed something to cover the walls with, went out with a £1 disposable, got a handful of click frames and job done.
Up to the roof terrace (past the second floor housing the kitchen), and it’s actually quite nice. Pretty full up there, especially for a Wednesday night, but it’s not too tight. Friendly crowd arty types, if you don’t mind them, they don’t mind you. Just don’t get into a long conversation about the extremities of some artist they’ve just made up so they can claim to be ‘in to’ something no one else is even aware of, then call everyone ‘imbeciles’.
BEER SELECTION – Poor. 1 bitter. 2 lagers. Bulmers, but mostly warm. And only basic spirits - *
COST OF A ROUND – £10 - ***
STAFF – Smiley, relaxed, but don’t expect them to work any harder than this when it gets busy. - ***
FOOD – Good selection. Pretty cheap. Didn’t taste anything, but the chips look good - ****
SKIRT RATIO – Plenty of ladies… most very nice, and presentable. But they won’t look at you twice unless you’re either in a band, or a tortured artist. - ***
Overall - ***
From the review, I feel I should give it two, but if it’s not that busy, it’s pretty relaxing and laid back for an after work tipple.
Red Lion - Hoxton - Brought to you by James Wormald -